.work in progress.

it seemed like the wisest choice
the easiest way
to shut it all out
to not care
to be indifferent
what started out as a means
to protect myself
to save myself ( or so i thought)
have evolved into
something so dark
so sinister
its terrifying
the shutters that were pulled down
to detract from the shining beams
of darkness
have slowly been stripped off
one by one
leaving residue of
cynicism
indifference
and jaded emotions
they werent there before

assimilated into every nook and cranny
I find myself wondering
Is this how it goes
Empty faces surround me
Where is everyone?
When I need them
When I don’t need them

Sometimes though
Its easier to pretend
Sometimes though
You don’t have to pretend
Security is no longer a given
No longer an assumption
“you have to make up your mind and work towards the goal..;
Hope is for losers.”
Its not a straight and wide road.. in which you can see the end
Its curved with hills and valleys…
Dotted with hurricane and thunderstorms
most times you can only see a hundred meters ahead of you
other times you don’t want to see at all..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

jotted down ages ago because well, i kept getting all these thoughts that i wanted to turn into a piece, an artwork hell whatever but i kept gettin interupted. in fact im not even sure if its finished or not.. hence the given title.

though i cant remember what state of mind i was in during the conception of this, enlightenment i do realise the emotions at play..

verbalising your thoughts, your wishes, your disapointments, your most menial disposition can be realised oh so truly..

ahhh my train of thoughts is lost..

.work in progress.