dawning comprehension..

she never really cared
about what people would think about her
said about her
judged about her
she was happy
and thus
she was doing no wrong
so in her opinion
all that they could think, say, judge about
were happy stuff..

then came the day
when all hell broke loose
the sun stopped shining
the birds ceased their singing
surprised;
she looked around her slowly
and realised that she did care
about the things people thought and said about her
about how people judged her;

and so she sank.

Reality

a) The curtains are opening
bright lights shine
the red carpet gleams to all
stars...
an illusion of a fading dream

b) tell me what you see
the curtains are half closed
noone is breathing
waiting.
the currents are dying.

c) clouded
unwilling to see
now unavoidable
the curtains are open
the bright lights are flickering
the red carpet doesnt shine as much
there are no stars.

reality.

Everything Burns

She sits in her corner
Singing herself to sleep
Wrapped in all of the promises
That no one seems to keep
She no longer cries to herself
No tears left to wash away
Just diaries of empty pages
Feelings gone astray
But she will sing

Till everything burns
While everyone screams
Burning their lies
Burning my dreams
All of this hate
And all of this pain
I'll burn it all down
As my anger reigns
Till everything burns

Walking through life unnoticed
Knowing that no one cares
Too consumed in their masquerade
No one sees her there
And still she sings

Till everything burns
While everyone screams
Burning their lies
Burning my dreams
All of this hate
And all of this pain
I'll burn it all down

As my anger reigns

Till Everything burns
Everything burns
Watching it all fade away..

things that makes me smile..

1) d a n c e i.e. dancing i.e. dance class O_o

2) my m u s i c ~ 'chariot' etcetcetc

3) receiving letters/cards/stuff from my darlingSsssss i.e. kindred spirit, bestfwen, baby, ppl who matter..

4) m e m o r i e s of silly/stupid funny/happy/dumb times with my darlingSssss

5) b o o k s i.e. reading i.e. the ones that makes me laugh... O_0

6) G I L M O R E G I R L S !!!! nuff said..

7) the thought of seeing my loved ones again....soon i hope...